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Sexuality in China

Hi, folks. I am Jason Wu, an international exchange student from Xiamen University in China. Xiamen is regarded as the “garden on the sea” which is one of the most popular traveling destinations in China. Sunny weather, blue sky and clean beach are my favorite.

This topic totally scared me when first saw it. I have no idea of how to talk about sex. Why?
I think what I will talk about is the cause of this embarrassment and some phenomenon behind this reaction in my brain.

I think in a sense that Chinese people prefer to be modest and stick to tradition. But with the Reform and Open Policy, I really feel that there have been a lot of changes in China these past years; not only the high speed economic growth, but also the evolution of some concepts. Sex is one on the list.

I was born in the time when China is changing dramatically. My past 20 years have seen a lot of reforms and changes happening in China.

At the beginning of the Reform and Open Policy, it was a great advantage for China to take an important place in manufacture as the world market was growing. China has inherent advantages to produce high-quality products with lower price which, in return, directly promote the industrial and economic development in China. For instance, my hometown is a small village twenty years ago. My parents live poor lives when they were in vulnerable age. After Reform and Open Policy, tons of foreign investment flooded into my hometown. As a result, the growing industry stimulated economic growth and improved workers’ salary. People are becoming wealthier. All of these changes make us believe that reforms are good for the nation.

So most of Chinese people prefer to be more open to respect Western cultures and accept new technologies. In traditional Chinese conception, sex is a very sensitive topic and even forbidden to talk in public. With more and more western media and customs being popular in the young generation, attitude towards sex is changing over time. For instance, my parents used to think relationship is very serious. They cannot accept that a girl has a sexual relationship with some guys before marriage. These days, some couples do have relationship before marriage. I think it is a significant change which implies that some Chinese people have broken the traditional gap and decided to pursue what they want. Especially the young generation in China: youngsters chase fashion and respect personal styles. In the meantime, it is easier for them to be influenced by some western movies and advertisements. Personally, I treat sex relationship very seriously, but sometime, my friends treat it a funny way and talk about sex in a different way. Here is a joke my friends told me:

James called his boss, said:” I am sorry that I cannot go to work today since I am so tired now.” His boss said:” – “But we really need your help! I have a good way to deal with it. When I feel bad, I often ask my wife for sex, after that I feel totally energetic.” “All right, I will try it.” James said. After an hour, James called his boss again, said:” I appreciate your direction, I am much better now and on my way to work. By the way, you’ve got a nice house.”

Now let me tell you something about the One-Child Policy. China has a large population. With this policy, many children in China are regarded as the center of the family. They are often spoiled by their parents. It partially explains why the young generation accepts easier Western cultures, because they are less controlled and restricted by their parents. Therefore, some youngsters will accept the more open concept of sex and have sexual relationships before marriage.

Just like the Reform: at the very beginning, most of Chinese citizens worried about whether it is a good way to improve the country or it is a wrong way to ruin it. So far, we think that it does help us a lot to make the nation develop faster. But we should confess that it also leads to some inevitable social problems. It is the same concerning the changing attitude towards sexuality. We cannot just say that the change is good or not, we are concerned about the change and willing to change, also, we are glad to face the consequences coming with that.

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